Why Valentine’s day is no longer a dread

As a single woman I used to dread Valentine’s day. Seeing couples constantly display their PDA on the streets or in the restaurant made me sour, and sad. Seeing couples in love, reminded me of the dreams I was once had when I was in a relationship, and the good times that were shared.

However, in this new stage in my life, I’m devoted to myself. To love and cherish. To honor and adore. And, that’s exactly what I do on V-day now. To all my singles out there, I want to say don’t see the day of love as just for couples, but for the time for you to truly love, honor and cherish yourself. The day you can treat yourself to an expensive meal, a cute pair of shoes, and a nice outfit, or a day you can call out of work to just rest and enjoy your own company at home.

Love and relationships are a beautiful thing, but for those of us who aren’t in one, it doesn’t mean that we have to be sad or bitter when Valentine’s day comes around. As much as I would enjoy someone’s company, I enjoy my own just fine.

Love ya,
Nakesha

Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man….Umm…NO!

Almost everyone around the world has heard of this book.  Many even give it a thumbs up for Steve’s insight on relationships. However, I have a problem with these types of books that try to tell people how they should be in a relationship. Let me tell you the truth, you should be YOURSELF and if they can’t handle that, then they’re not for you.

A relationship is not a game, seeing who can act better than the other, creating tactics and strategy to make the other do what you want. It’s about two people coming together to learn, grow, support, build, and help one another cherishing the other’s personality & character regardless of anything  that seems less than perfect because you care for that person. And, yes, I am a romantic at heart and I’m NOT going to change that because of a few bad females who gave some males a bad impression. Notice, I said females and not women because women know how to act. My loving, caring, playful nature and thoughtfulness should not have to be “toned down” put on the back burner or tweaked  because guys are used to dealing with “THOTS” , one- night stands and others of the like. Not a part of that club and proud of it.

I say, that as a woman, I was offended that a man had to write a book such as this. What is this saying about us, ladies, as a whole?  Are we not valuing ourselves enough to portray a decent image or an example of what a woman should be?  Sadly, in this world  it seems like the majority are not. I was raised to respect myself being taught that I am a jewel. Not to disrespect myself by associating with someone who has no respect, nor, regard for my values, morals and goals.

I hope one day some of these females get that it’s not about who you can sleep with,  how beat your face can look, or purchasing the shortest dress, skirt or low cut blouse you can find that shows all your stuff. But what YOU have going on in your head and for yourself  that will project you into a successful and prosperous future solo, until your Mr. Right comes. Some of these “ladies” are walking around looking like dime pieces but aren’t even worth one cent.

So,  act like a lady and think like a man? NOT! Because there is nothing wrong with me and the personality I have and if people want to call me naïve, hungry, thirsty or whatever else because of my natural born nature, then I’m not for you anyway.  I’m for the mature man only.  But to all the ladies who have a problem maintaining high morals, standards & vision; being willing to sleep with anyone who puts a smile on your face, then this book is for you.

~Nakesha~

Finally Over Him

Yes! It’s here! The day has come. The moment you realize that you are finally over your ex. One of the best feelings in the world.

Everyone has been there and  you know what I’m talking about. It’s like you got your independence back and you’re free. No more agonizing over what didn’t happen, what he or she did, or moments of anger as you sit down and plot revengeful things that you know you will never do. You don’t care anymore  if he or she never calls,  it wouldn’t bother you one bit. The day is here and your going to bask in it.  Ahhh. . . feel the sunrays shining down on you as you’re ready to go and fly to see what or who the world has for you. 🙂  Yes! Throw your arms back, looking up at the sun, smiling as it’s beaming on your face because you’ve forgotten about your ex and he or she gets no play time in your head whatsoever. I’m sure if you were walking on the street and should perhaps run into him or her, you would snub them and keep on walking, as they deserve. And, if they should just happen to call out your name, stop dead in your tracks, turn around, look at them intensely and say, “I’m sorry but do we know each other? I think NOT!” And keep it moving.

Now you’re own your way to victory and he or she is just a thing of the past that has been forgotten.

From Me To You With Love,

Nakesha

Let Him Go!

We have all been there.  Liking that special someone (or so you thought) who just doesn’t seem to like you back.  You go through the motions of “What did I do?“  “How come he doesn’t like me?” Then finally the  “WHAT’S WRONG WITH HIM?!” question because you know somethin’ ain’t right, with him I mean.

Ladies, please get that it’s not you. Sure, there may be some things about you that could possibly aggravate him and there could very well be some areas in your life that you need to improve and work on but the bottom line is, if he liked you he would let you know that and if that’s not happening you need to LET HIM GO.  Don’t fool yourself thinking that things will workout and say     . . he likes me, he just needs to get himself together. No! If he needs time to get himself together and he’s not making any room for you,  then you need to leave so he can find himself. Now, don’t get me wrong there are some guys out here that can use their woman’s  assistance in helping to find themselves and reciprocate the love. However, if you’ve done more than enough for your guy and he isn’t being responsive to you, your needs, feelings, kindness or loyalty, then it is time for you to get rid of him.  Close the door, say “buh bye” and keep chucking because he’s not worth it.

I know that there are times that a relationship will be tested and  you will need to work things out to be that special couple you want to be BUT if he didn’t spend Christmas with you, Valentines Day, New Years, your birthday or any other special day or  holiday (I think I named them all) then it’s time for him to go. If you guys never go out or you haven’t been out in the last 2 or 3 months –  don’t waste another minute on him.   Please listen to me when I say this because this is the truth,  if a guy likes you, he’ll show you and prove it to you. You won’t have to chase him or guess how feels about you because he won’t have a problem in letting you know.  So stop making-up excuses for his lack of relationalship  behavior i.e. not calling, texting and so forth. (I just made that word up but it seems to fit 🙂 ).  If he’s not showing you that he cares, keep walking and forget about him.

And, I know it’s disappointing when you put your time, energy and feelings into someone and they can’t seem to give you that appreciation or concern back.  You probably kept thinking that things will change and get better but the truth is you need to change. Change that way of thinking and end it and do your thing because you better believe he’s doing his. Things are not going to get better as long as he is going to continue to act the same way. So stop holding on to something that’s not right for you.  You are worth someone paying attention to you, spending time with you,  caring about you, taking you out, and celebrating with you the most exciting & memorable days of your life and if that’s not happening with him, then you need to cut it off. You don’t want someone who could care-less about you and not be there for you, when you are worth so much more.

So, forget about the one that did you wrong and make room for the one(s) that would gladly love to treat you right.

Love yourself,  your life and treat yourself right and everything will be alright.

If he’s just not that into you, he’s just not that into you, so leave him alone.

From Me To You With Love,

Nakesha

 

 

 

 

There Are Still Some Good Men In the World

This post is dedicated to all the good men who are loving, faithful, caring and appreciative to their girlfriend, fiancée or wife.

Now a days it seems like all we hear is what men do wrong and how they’ve failed here and there but believe it or not there are some men who value relationship, respect, trust and honor when it comes to their woman. I have met some men who are diligent about doing the right thing and making sure their girlfriend, fiancée or wife knows that she is truly appreciated and loved and most importantly there are men that see their better half as a gift that is to be handled with care and nurtured.

I was moved to write this post because good men are rarely celebrated. When I was growing up I saw how my dad truly loved my mom and vice versa. He was not only a good dad but a good husband to my mother. He lavished her with nice things, always telling her how much he loved her and the kissing, OH MY GOSH, ALWAYS kissing. (smh – shaking my head). With all the negative things I heard about men, I used to think to myself “they obviously haven’t met my dad.” Even though I was young I was thinking all men can’t possibly be bad.  All men can’t be cheaters, liars and users, then I grew up.  A lot of them were but there were a good number of men who weren’t.

Today I am proud to say that I have witnessed lot of good faithful men treating their woman with the up-most respect, taking the time out of their day to surprise her or to let her know that she’s loved and cared for,  to make it a point in letting her know how meaningful she is and most importantly reassuring  her that she has a dependable and loyal man to rely on.  To you guys I say continue doing what you’re doing and maybe others will follow suit. I am declaring this day as your day to be recognized for your tenderheartedness, kindness, love and loyalty . You are saluted because you are not honored as often as you should be but hopefully, one day that will change. You are the man who comforts his woman when she’s emotional, you are the man who wipes away her tears when she just wants to cry, you are the one who encourages her when she needs encouragement and you’re the one who sticks by her side when she needs you the most. What a good man you are.

So to all of the women who are single, YES, there are some good men still out there, so please don’t waste your time on the ones who don’t care about you. You are too valuable for that. You want a man that won’t judge you for how you’re not, but will love you for who you are, a man that will stick by you unconditionally and not only when the conditions seem good and of course a man who looks forward to spending time with you even if it is just sitting on the couch talking about nothing watching old re-runs.

Ladies, please do not accept someone who does not value your worth, make you feel special or who never seems to have time for you, because that is unacceptable. One thing I do know, if a man cares about a woman he most definitely takes time to spend with her and if your guy isn’t spending time with you, don’t waste your time on him because believe me, he’s spending time with someone.  So don’t settle for less because you’re worth more, and the guy that is meant for you will see the good that is in you and will help you to be your best self as you help him and you will feel his love and appreciation. You’ve heard the saying “good things come to those who wait.” Well, just continue to wait patiently and happily and he’ll come. You’re not alone because I’m waiting for Mr. Right too. 🙂


And fellas you know the saying, behind every good man is a good woman and I must say that is true. If you continue to honor your woman,  she will always make sure to honor you.

I know the fireworks went off for the fourth of July but cheers to all of the good and honest men that are out there. Today YOU are honored.
From Me to You With Love,

Nakesha

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